Sarah E. Miller, “Hope and Healing in Recovering from Abuse,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 36–39
Those struggling with the results of abuse can receive peace through the gospel of Jesus Christ.
As a child, Emma (name has been changed) was abused. Now, as a 33-year-old mother of four, she quietly weeps in my office. “I don’t understand,” she stammers. “I try to be faithful, pay an honest tithe, attend church, and serve in callings. Why do I feel so worthless? Why can’t I feel God’s love?” As a Latter-day Saint psychotherapist living and practicing in the United Kingdom, I have witnessed this scenario repeatedly over the years as I have counseled abused Church members in a professional capacity.
Many of my clients, like Emma, currently live faithful lives but continue to struggle with the effects of abuse in their past. In some cases, they perceive Heavenly Father as remote, stern, critical, or condemning. They assume that they “deserved” the abuse, that it was somehow their fault. In other cases, they feel as though their experiences place them beyond the healing power of the Savior. Church activity can seem overwhelming to these individuals, often because they compare themselves with other members and develop feelings of inadequacy. “What’s wrong with me?” they ask. “Why do I feel so unworthy?” Faced with ramifications such as addictions, self-hatred, mental illnesses, or broken relationships, they are eager to find hope and rest, but sometimes they are unsure about how to do so.
I am convinced that Latter-day Saints—or anyone, for that matter—struggling with the results of abuse or childhood trauma can receive peace through the gospel of Jesus Christ. The effects of abuse may persist for a while, but the power of the Atonement can ultimately relieve such burdens and facilitate healing. The Savior included those who have been abused when he beckoned, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). The Savior’s promise of rest can help victims know that God does love them, that they can feel His love, that they can forgive, and that their wounds can be healed.
“Why Did He Let This Happen?”
Clients frequently come to me feeling angry or resentful, asserting that a loving God would never have abandoned them to a fate of abuse. They perceive a lack of divine intervention as an indication of their personal unworthiness. However, Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has said, “There can be some who choose willfully to violate the commandments and harm you. … [But] the Lord has provided a way for you to overcome the destructive results of others’ acts against your will.”1
Healing occurs when individuals learn to search for and accept the Savior’s love. For example, I know of a case where a young brother and sister, twins, were forced to flee from their home late one night. Their stepfather had exploded in rage and threatened to kill them. As they wandered the dark streets searching for a place to rest, they discovered a secluded stairwell in an apartment building. Cold, exhausted, and fearful, they huddled together and somehow slept.
Years later, as an adult, one of those children questioned God, “Why didn’t you help us? Where were you?” An unexpected, gentle answer came to her mind, confirming that He had truly watched over her that night—that He in effect had sent angels who stood sentinel. In searching for answers, she hearkened to the Spirit’s whisperings and came to know that God loves her and is with her in times of need.
Our mortal experiences, however difficult they may be, can be channeled to help us know God and to learn about who we are in relationship to Him. When we learn that we are His children, we can feel that His love for us is unbounded: “Since thou wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee: therefore will I give men for thee, and people for thy life” (Isaiah 43:4).
“Why Am I Unable to Feel His Love?”
Even though they may know about God’s love on an intellectual basis, many people who have suffered abuse cannot, at least initially, fathom His caring for them individually. Some have never experienced a kind, loving, and respectful earthly father, so thinking about God in such terms is a difficult challenge.
To help transcend this barrier, I often ask clients to first think about the people they know who have loving qualities: a spouse, a bishop, or other Church leaders. Next, I ask them to visualize Heavenly Father listening to and responding to their prayers in ways that their spouse, bishop, or leaders might respond. With practice, the Spirit teaches them, and they begin to feel Heavenly Father’s tremendous love and compassion, often for the first time. As Jeremiah wrote: “I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.
“Then shall you call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.
“And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:11–13).
Bishops play an especially vital role in the process of helping the abused feel God’s love. Though not all aggressors are male, when this is the case, subsequent relationships with males may be awkward or difficult. To restore healthy attitudes, victims need to see examples of men, particularly fathers, who live righteously and according to gospel standards. By serving in a fatherly role, bishops become healing instruments as they afford sensitive counsel, positive examples, and effective priesthood leadership devoid of unrighteous dominion. Others can assist in the recovery process by reflecting the Savior’s love and sacrifice in how they serve selflessly.
“How Can I Forgive?”
Forgiveness is often difficult because offenders may deny their behavior or avoid acknowledging it. Regardless of how the offender responds—even if the perpetrator does not admit responsibility—the person who has been abused can choose to forgive. It is important to note that forgiveness does not necessarily mean forgetting the offense, trusting the offender, or even associating with him or her. However, it does mean letting go of self-destructive anger.
To help the abused person forgive, leaders, friends, and family members can acknowledge the gravity of the offense, allowing the innocent person to work through his or her anger and pain. Much abuse involves the denial of feelings and truth, so people who have been abused need to be heard and have their feelings validated if they are to truly recover and regain self-worth. When the person who has been abused is pressured to forgive, he or she may feel an added measure of guilt, taking the blame not only for the abuse itself but also for being unable to forgive. Allowing the person time to forgive can be a lengthy process, but it is critical to healing.
Some may fear that their loved one might become stuck at this stage or obsessed with unhealthy rage. However, although needlessly extending this painful process can be unproductive, insisting on forgiveness before feelings have been adequately acknowledged may cause withdrawal and may impede healing. Bishops and other supportive members can facilitate healing by empathetically allowing the hurt to find its expression and then offering Christlike love.
“How Can My Wounds Heal?”
Some members feel so unclean, unworthy, or damaged that they live on the fringes, never allowing the blessings of the Atonement to heal their distress. They believe that their hurt can never be mended or that their pain is greater than the Savior’s ability to heal. Satan is the author of these lies, for “we believe that through the Atonement of Christ, all mankind may be saved” (Articles of Faith 1:3; emphasis added). Through patience, charity, spiritual awareness, and prayer, Church leaders can reach even the most troubled souls, dispelling negative ideas, instilling hope, and fostering self-worth.
The journey of recovery from abuse can be long and lonely. However, through my work I have witnessed the undeniable power of the Atonement to renew and revitalize lives. In the advent of abuse, people feel helpless in not knowing what to do or where to turn. But those who suffer—and those charged with the responsibility to help them—are not alone. The saving principles of the gospel have the power and capacity to heal wounded souls. Not only does the Atonement wash the sins of repentant offenders, but it also reconciles with God all who may feel estranged from His love, including the abused and their families.
President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, has taught that it is often necessary to “walk to the edge of the light, and perhaps a few steps into the darkness, and … the light will appear and move ahead of you.”2 In other words, it takes faith to move forward. But when we exercise faith in His omnipotence, we begin to feel the atoning power of the Savior, who bore our pain in Gethsemane. We become free to receive refreshing inner peace born of spiritual renewal that arises from the Atonement’s cleansing and healing power.
Hope in His Sacrifice
The Savior’s sacrifice provides tremendous hope on the path of recovery from abuse: “He hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives … to set at liberty them that are bruised” (Luke 4:18). Through prayer, faith, scripture study, hearkening to the Spirit, counseling with priesthood leaders, and receiving support from friends or relatives, those who have been abused can see a road to complete healing.
Many times I have counseled Latter-day Saints recovering from the trauma of abuse, I can testify that though recovery may seem difficult and fraught with temporary setbacks, the Savior offers solace to aching hearts, heals wounded souls, and changes sorrow into joy. All who have been hurt can receive relief through the Atonement of Him who knows and has experienced all: “He will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy … that he may know … how to succor his people” (Alma 7:12).
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
My Neighbor's Magazine
Laura Pilcher, “My Neigbor’s Magazine,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 35
We had become dissatisfied with the church we were attending and decided it was time to find another congregation of our faith. When we bought our first home in a nearby town, it was the perfect opportunity to attend another church.
One day the mailman accidentally delivered an Ensign magazine to our mailbox. It belonged to our new neighbors, Tom and Jan Smith, and that was how we learned they were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I did not know anything about the LDS Church except what I had learned in school about the Mormon Trail, so I was curious to find out all I could. I kept the Ensign for a week and read it cover to cover. That particular issue featured articles on the family. I was overjoyed to find a church that believed what I did—that families are important and that it is our responsibility to care for them. I took the Ensign to Tom and Jan when I had finished reading it, but I did not tell them I had kept it for a week.
A year and a half later we received a job transfer to another state, but before we left, Tom talked to us about the Church. I truly believe the Ensign was delivered to our house for a purpose. The entire issue was devoted to the family, which was the very reason we had been searching for another church. As a result, I was able to listen to the plan of salvation with an open heart because I had felt the truth of the gospel in the pages I had read a year and a half earlier in the Ensign.
I gained a testimony and was baptized four months later. After my husband’s baptism, we were sealed for time and eternity in the Washington D.C. Temple, and we have since raised four children in the gospel. Our son and his wife were sealed in the Atlanta Georgia Temple and are raising their son in the Church.
Now, many years later, the Ensign is a staple in our home. It is a blessing to our family to have such inspiring articles and artwork available at our fingertips every month. I will forever be grateful to the Lord that the mailman delivered the Ensign to our home and opened our door to the blessings of the gospel.
Sometimes a mistake can become a blessing in disguise.
We had become dissatisfied with the church we were attending and decided it was time to find another congregation of our faith. When we bought our first home in a nearby town, it was the perfect opportunity to attend another church.
One day the mailman accidentally delivered an Ensign magazine to our mailbox. It belonged to our new neighbors, Tom and Jan Smith, and that was how we learned they were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I did not know anything about the LDS Church except what I had learned in school about the Mormon Trail, so I was curious to find out all I could. I kept the Ensign for a week and read it cover to cover. That particular issue featured articles on the family. I was overjoyed to find a church that believed what I did—that families are important and that it is our responsibility to care for them. I took the Ensign to Tom and Jan when I had finished reading it, but I did not tell them I had kept it for a week.
A year and a half later we received a job transfer to another state, but before we left, Tom talked to us about the Church. I truly believe the Ensign was delivered to our house for a purpose. The entire issue was devoted to the family, which was the very reason we had been searching for another church. As a result, I was able to listen to the plan of salvation with an open heart because I had felt the truth of the gospel in the pages I had read a year and a half earlier in the Ensign.
I gained a testimony and was baptized four months later. After my husband’s baptism, we were sealed for time and eternity in the Washington D.C. Temple, and we have since raised four children in the gospel. Our son and his wife were sealed in the Atlanta Georgia Temple and are raising their son in the Church.
Now, many years later, the Ensign is a staple in our home. It is a blessing to our family to have such inspiring articles and artwork available at our fingertips every month. I will forever be grateful to the Lord that the mailman delivered the Ensign to our home and opened our door to the blessings of the gospel.
Sometimes a mistake can become a blessing in disguise.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Men of a Sound Understanding
Daniel K Judd, “Men of a Sound Understanding,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 32–34
I bear testimony that the scriptures, the teachings of latter-day prophets, and the influence of the Holy Ghost will assist each of us as we follow the examples of the sons of Mosiah and become men and women of “a sound understanding.”
The scriptural account of the sons of Mosiah—Ammon, Aaron, Omner, and Himni—being transformed from “the very vilest of sinners” (Mosiah 28:4) to “men of a sound understanding” (Alma 17:2) includes important lessons for each of us.
It is possible for people to be transformed from "the very vilest of sinners" to being "men of a sound understanding". This happens through the atonement of Jesus Christ.
Following their conversion and 14 years of missionary service in separate lands, the sons of Mosiah and Alma the Younger were reunited. Alma rejoiced upon seeing that his formerly rebellious friends “were still his brethren in the Lord” and that “they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth” (Alma 17:2). In addition to describing who these remarkable men had become, Mormon describes how they had become valuable instruments in bringing the Lamanites unto repentance. He recorded that the sons of Mosiah:
The sons of Mosiah were on a mission among the lamanites. It lasted 14 YEARS!
• “Confess[ed] all their sins” (Mosiah 27:35).
• “Searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God” (Alma 17:2).
• “Had given themselves to much prayer, and fasting” (Alma 17:3).
• “Had the spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation” (Alma 17:3).
• Sought for “a portion of [the] Spirit to go with them” (Alma 17:9).
• “Taught with power and authority of God” (Alma 17:3).
The changes we need to make in our lives may not be as drastic as those made by the sons of Mosiah, but each of us is capable of improving our lives by increasing our commitment to the Savior, His gospel, and our fellow brothers and sisters. President Brigham Young taught that living the gospel of Jesus Christ can “make bad men good and good men better.”1
The effect of living the gospel of Jesus Christ: "make bad men good and good men better".
Years ago when I was called to serve as a bishop, I naively believed that I was equal to the task. I had served a full-time mission and afterward had been called to a variety of Church callings. I had taught in the Church Educational System for a number of years. I had advanced academic and clinical training in psychology and marriage and family relations. But little did I realize the challenges that lay ahead.
It took only a few days for me to realize that effectively serving as a bishop was more difficult than I had anticipated. I quickly came to understand that though I had been given the authority to serve, I wasn’t the kind of leader, teacher, father, or husband I knew the Lord wanted me to be. With all my heart I wanted to bless my family and my ward by being a man “of a sound understanding” (Alma 17:2) like the sons of Mosiah and like the many leaders and teachers who had blessed my life.
Despite working hard to serve, I began to be discouraged, feeling that I wasn’t helping my family and ward members in the ways they needed to be helped. My discouragement deepened, and my physical health declined. During these difficult days I discovered the following counsel from President Ezra Taft Benson (1899–1994): “Often we spend great effort in trying to increase the activity levels in our stakes. We work diligently to raise the percentages of those attending sacrament meetings. We labor to get a higher percentage of our young men on missions. We strive to improve the numbers of those marrying in the temple. All of these are commendable efforts and important to the growth of the kingdom. But when individual members and families immerse themselves in the scriptures regularly and consistently, these other areas of activity will automatically come. Testimonies will increase. Commitment will be strengthened. Families will be fortified. Personal revelation will flow.”2
The source to activity in the ward, is that the members study the scriptures. This is a great quote from Pres. Benson.
President Benson’s words pricked my heart and invited me to set a course that would change my life. I realized that while I might have been working hard to serve others, I hadn’t been serving in the way the Lord had intended. I felt a growing desire to study and truly immerse myself in the scriptures and to encourage my family and ward members to do the same.
The changes I was hoping for weren’t instant, but I was surprised at how quickly things began to turn around. Our sacrament meetings, priesthood and auxiliary classes, and leadership meetings came alive as we followed the examples of the sons of Mosiah and “searched the scriptures diligently, that [we] might know the word of God” (Alma 17:2). I discovered a much greater measure of the Spirit in my own life, in my relationships with my family, and in helping ward members with difficult challenges. My discouragement turned to joy, and my health problems improved dramatically.
I had previously come to love the scriptures as a missionary and as a seminary and institute teacher, but I’m not sure I had ever fully realized the great power they have to change lives—including my own. I discovered that while there was certainly value in inviting ward members to speak in sacrament meeting on topics such as honesty, friendship, patience, and kindness, there was even greater power in inviting them to teach doctrinal principles from the scriptures—doctrines such as faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost. Our ward leadership meetings became important discussions on how we could better help ward members study and understand the scriptures and the words of the living prophets.
It is bettter to teach about faith in Christ, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost, than to teach about honesty, friendship, patience, and kindness. We ought to talk more about repentance.
I bear testimony that the scriptures, the teachings of latter-day prophets, and the influence of the Holy Ghost will assist each of us as we follow the examples of the sons of Mosiah and become men and women of “a sound understanding.” I pray that each of us will consider what we can do to more faithfully follow the example of the sons of Mosiah, who, by searching the scriptures diligently, obtained the understanding necessary to become “instrument[s] in the hands of God to bring some soul[s] to repentance” (Alma 29:9).
I bear testimony that the scriptures, the teachings of latter-day prophets, and the influence of the Holy Ghost will assist each of us as we follow the examples of the sons of Mosiah and become men and women of “a sound understanding.”
The scriptural account of the sons of Mosiah—Ammon, Aaron, Omner, and Himni—being transformed from “the very vilest of sinners” (Mosiah 28:4) to “men of a sound understanding” (Alma 17:2) includes important lessons for each of us.
It is possible for people to be transformed from "the very vilest of sinners" to being "men of a sound understanding". This happens through the atonement of Jesus Christ.
Following their conversion and 14 years of missionary service in separate lands, the sons of Mosiah and Alma the Younger were reunited. Alma rejoiced upon seeing that his formerly rebellious friends “were still his brethren in the Lord” and that “they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth” (Alma 17:2). In addition to describing who these remarkable men had become, Mormon describes how they had become valuable instruments in bringing the Lamanites unto repentance. He recorded that the sons of Mosiah:
The sons of Mosiah were on a mission among the lamanites. It lasted 14 YEARS!
• “Confess[ed] all their sins” (Mosiah 27:35).
• “Searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God” (Alma 17:2).
• “Had given themselves to much prayer, and fasting” (Alma 17:3).
• “Had the spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation” (Alma 17:3).
• Sought for “a portion of [the] Spirit to go with them” (Alma 17:9).
• “Taught with power and authority of God” (Alma 17:3).
The changes we need to make in our lives may not be as drastic as those made by the sons of Mosiah, but each of us is capable of improving our lives by increasing our commitment to the Savior, His gospel, and our fellow brothers and sisters. President Brigham Young taught that living the gospel of Jesus Christ can “make bad men good and good men better.”1
The effect of living the gospel of Jesus Christ: "make bad men good and good men better".
Years ago when I was called to serve as a bishop, I naively believed that I was equal to the task. I had served a full-time mission and afterward had been called to a variety of Church callings. I had taught in the Church Educational System for a number of years. I had advanced academic and clinical training in psychology and marriage and family relations. But little did I realize the challenges that lay ahead.
It took only a few days for me to realize that effectively serving as a bishop was more difficult than I had anticipated. I quickly came to understand that though I had been given the authority to serve, I wasn’t the kind of leader, teacher, father, or husband I knew the Lord wanted me to be. With all my heart I wanted to bless my family and my ward by being a man “of a sound understanding” (Alma 17:2) like the sons of Mosiah and like the many leaders and teachers who had blessed my life.
Despite working hard to serve, I began to be discouraged, feeling that I wasn’t helping my family and ward members in the ways they needed to be helped. My discouragement deepened, and my physical health declined. During these difficult days I discovered the following counsel from President Ezra Taft Benson (1899–1994): “Often we spend great effort in trying to increase the activity levels in our stakes. We work diligently to raise the percentages of those attending sacrament meetings. We labor to get a higher percentage of our young men on missions. We strive to improve the numbers of those marrying in the temple. All of these are commendable efforts and important to the growth of the kingdom. But when individual members and families immerse themselves in the scriptures regularly and consistently, these other areas of activity will automatically come. Testimonies will increase. Commitment will be strengthened. Families will be fortified. Personal revelation will flow.”2
The source to activity in the ward, is that the members study the scriptures. This is a great quote from Pres. Benson.
President Benson’s words pricked my heart and invited me to set a course that would change my life. I realized that while I might have been working hard to serve others, I hadn’t been serving in the way the Lord had intended. I felt a growing desire to study and truly immerse myself in the scriptures and to encourage my family and ward members to do the same.
The changes I was hoping for weren’t instant, but I was surprised at how quickly things began to turn around. Our sacrament meetings, priesthood and auxiliary classes, and leadership meetings came alive as we followed the examples of the sons of Mosiah and “searched the scriptures diligently, that [we] might know the word of God” (Alma 17:2). I discovered a much greater measure of the Spirit in my own life, in my relationships with my family, and in helping ward members with difficult challenges. My discouragement turned to joy, and my health problems improved dramatically.
I had previously come to love the scriptures as a missionary and as a seminary and institute teacher, but I’m not sure I had ever fully realized the great power they have to change lives—including my own. I discovered that while there was certainly value in inviting ward members to speak in sacrament meeting on topics such as honesty, friendship, patience, and kindness, there was even greater power in inviting them to teach doctrinal principles from the scriptures—doctrines such as faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost. Our ward leadership meetings became important discussions on how we could better help ward members study and understand the scriptures and the words of the living prophets.
It is bettter to teach about faith in Christ, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost, than to teach about honesty, friendship, patience, and kindness. We ought to talk more about repentance.
I bear testimony that the scriptures, the teachings of latter-day prophets, and the influence of the Holy Ghost will assist each of us as we follow the examples of the sons of Mosiah and become men and women of “a sound understanding.” I pray that each of us will consider what we can do to more faithfully follow the example of the sons of Mosiah, who, by searching the scriptures diligently, obtained the understanding necessary to become “instrument[s] in the hands of God to bring some soul[s] to repentance” (Alma 29:9).
Monday, September 8, 2008
Chalk It Up to Learning
Robb Jones, “Chalk It Up to Learning,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 29–31
The chalkboard can enhance your teaching—when you use it properly.
As a teacher, I am always looking for effective ways to engage my students in the lesson. I thought I was making good use of the chalkboard or whiteboard until I saw the board in the classroom next door. There, neatly displayed in the center, was a simple statement of doctrine, a picture, and two questions along with instructions for the students to answer the questions. As the class members came in, I watched as they looked in their scriptures for answers to the two questions. They even discussed the doctrine with each other. And all this activity was happening before the start of class!
Things to put on the whiteboard before class: 1) Simple statement of doctrine in the center, 2 ) A picture, 3) Two questions with instructions for the students to answer the questions.
I was impressed. Here was a teacher using a simple tool to engage his students in learning during a time that was normally wasted. He still greeted his students and gathered them for an opening prayer, but when the lesson began, the Spirit of the Lord had already touched the hearts of many of the students. They were prepared for a wonderful experience in the scriptures.
Basic Guidelines
In addition to the guidelines in Teaching, No Greater Call (see pp. 162 and 182), I have found the following helpful in using the chalkboard or whiteboard to teach the gospel.
• Keep it simple. In the February 2007 worldwide leadership training meeting, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles reminded teachers that visual aids are aids. He said: “They are not a substitute for a lesson. Use them in a way that you would use spice in cooking—to flavor, to heighten, to accentuate, to enrich. A map or a painting or a video clip or a key point written on the board—these can often make the difference between a good lesson and a great lesson.”1
The whiteboard is a visual AID. Use it to flavor, to enrich.
• Prepare. Before you teach your lesson, organize on paper what you want to put on the board.
Prepare and organize what I want to put on the board.
• Write legibly. In Teaching, No Greater Call (item no. 36123), teachers are encouraged to “write clearly and large enough for all to see, making sure the material is well spaced, orderly, and easy to read.”2 You may want to invite a class member to help you.
What to Write
Here are several ways to use the chalkboard or whiteboard so class members have a more meaningful experience:
Write messages to class members:
• Greet students by writing, “Welcome to Class,” or “Have a Great Day.”
I like this! "Welcome to Class"...
• Compliment individuals for their school or Church achievements. For example: “Congratulations on achieving the Duty to God Award.”
• Have the quorum or class president write announcements for upcoming activities.
Create interest and enhance the lesson by writing:
• The lesson title: Write the title of the lesson or a phrase that represents the lesson. This will help students think about the lesson before class starts.
The lesson title.
• A question: Write a question on the board that you will ask later in the lesson. You could even ask students to write down a response before class starts. This will produce more meaningful discussions.
• A drawing: Many students are visual learners. Consider drawing or having a student draw simple pictures of people, objects, or events on the board. For example, you could draw a candle on a candlestick holder, a bushel, and a hill. Then you could invite students to read Matthew 5:14–16 and determine the relationship between the objects.
• An outline: The board can be used to organize the lesson into small parts that are easy for students to understand. For example, if you were teaching Mosiah 11:1–15 about wicked King Noah, his priests, and the burdens he put on his Nephite people, you could write on the board “Noah,” “Priests,” and “People.” As students discover the characteristics of each group, you or a student could write the characteristics under each title.
Increase student participation by writing:
• Students’ thoughts: Invite students to come to the board and write short phrases that represent their thoughts about a topic, such as why temples are important to them.
• Student surveys: If you are teaching a lesson on Church standards, you could write the words “Word of Wisdom,” “Honesty,” and “Morality” in three columns. You could place check marks under the standards that class members think are most difficult for people to live. Then ask them to share their feelings.
• Students’ answers: Use the board to have students write their answers to a question. Suppose you were giving a lesson on the Holy Ghost. You could have students write their answers to this question: “What truths does God reveal to us through the Holy Ghost?”
Effective Teaching Using a Simple Tool
Of course, these are only some of the many ways you can facilitate learning by using the chalkboard or whiteboard. You can think of other ways, adapting them to your class and topic.
Use the Chalkboard to Focus Attention
“I think that no teaching aid surpasses, and few equal, the chalkboard: first, because it is simple to use, and next, because it is universally available—everywhere in the world you can get a chalkboard. You can use it to focus the eyes of your students while the main lesson is presented audibly. As you talk, you can put just enough on the board to focus their attention and give them the idea, but never so much that the visual aid itself distracts them.”
President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Teach Ye Diligently (1975), 266.
If you’re looking for something new to help others learn the gospel, you might start by taking a fresh look at something old—
The chalkboard!
Matthew 5:14–16
Consider drawing simple pictures on the board and inviting students to read a scripture to determine the relationship between the pictures.
The chalkboard can enhance your teaching—when you use it properly.
As a teacher, I am always looking for effective ways to engage my students in the lesson. I thought I was making good use of the chalkboard or whiteboard until I saw the board in the classroom next door. There, neatly displayed in the center, was a simple statement of doctrine, a picture, and two questions along with instructions for the students to answer the questions. As the class members came in, I watched as they looked in their scriptures for answers to the two questions. They even discussed the doctrine with each other. And all this activity was happening before the start of class!
Things to put on the whiteboard before class: 1) Simple statement of doctrine in the center, 2 ) A picture, 3) Two questions with instructions for the students to answer the questions.
I was impressed. Here was a teacher using a simple tool to engage his students in learning during a time that was normally wasted. He still greeted his students and gathered them for an opening prayer, but when the lesson began, the Spirit of the Lord had already touched the hearts of many of the students. They were prepared for a wonderful experience in the scriptures.
Basic Guidelines
In addition to the guidelines in Teaching, No Greater Call (see pp. 162 and 182), I have found the following helpful in using the chalkboard or whiteboard to teach the gospel.
• Keep it simple. In the February 2007 worldwide leadership training meeting, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles reminded teachers that visual aids are aids. He said: “They are not a substitute for a lesson. Use them in a way that you would use spice in cooking—to flavor, to heighten, to accentuate, to enrich. A map or a painting or a video clip or a key point written on the board—these can often make the difference between a good lesson and a great lesson.”1
The whiteboard is a visual AID. Use it to flavor, to enrich.
• Prepare. Before you teach your lesson, organize on paper what you want to put on the board.
Prepare and organize what I want to put on the board.
• Write legibly. In Teaching, No Greater Call (item no. 36123), teachers are encouraged to “write clearly and large enough for all to see, making sure the material is well spaced, orderly, and easy to read.”2 You may want to invite a class member to help you.
What to Write
Here are several ways to use the chalkboard or whiteboard so class members have a more meaningful experience:
Write messages to class members:
• Greet students by writing, “Welcome to Class,” or “Have a Great Day.”
I like this! "Welcome to Class"...
• Compliment individuals for their school or Church achievements. For example: “Congratulations on achieving the Duty to God Award.”
• Have the quorum or class president write announcements for upcoming activities.
Create interest and enhance the lesson by writing:
• The lesson title: Write the title of the lesson or a phrase that represents the lesson. This will help students think about the lesson before class starts.
The lesson title.
• A question: Write a question on the board that you will ask later in the lesson. You could even ask students to write down a response before class starts. This will produce more meaningful discussions.
• A drawing: Many students are visual learners. Consider drawing or having a student draw simple pictures of people, objects, or events on the board. For example, you could draw a candle on a candlestick holder, a bushel, and a hill. Then you could invite students to read Matthew 5:14–16 and determine the relationship between the objects.
• An outline: The board can be used to organize the lesson into small parts that are easy for students to understand. For example, if you were teaching Mosiah 11:1–15 about wicked King Noah, his priests, and the burdens he put on his Nephite people, you could write on the board “Noah,” “Priests,” and “People.” As students discover the characteristics of each group, you or a student could write the characteristics under each title.
Increase student participation by writing:
• Students’ thoughts: Invite students to come to the board and write short phrases that represent their thoughts about a topic, such as why temples are important to them.
• Student surveys: If you are teaching a lesson on Church standards, you could write the words “Word of Wisdom,” “Honesty,” and “Morality” in three columns. You could place check marks under the standards that class members think are most difficult for people to live. Then ask them to share their feelings.
• Students’ answers: Use the board to have students write their answers to a question. Suppose you were giving a lesson on the Holy Ghost. You could have students write their answers to this question: “What truths does God reveal to us through the Holy Ghost?”
Effective Teaching Using a Simple Tool
Of course, these are only some of the many ways you can facilitate learning by using the chalkboard or whiteboard. You can think of other ways, adapting them to your class and topic.
Use the Chalkboard to Focus Attention
“I think that no teaching aid surpasses, and few equal, the chalkboard: first, because it is simple to use, and next, because it is universally available—everywhere in the world you can get a chalkboard. You can use it to focus the eyes of your students while the main lesson is presented audibly. As you talk, you can put just enough on the board to focus their attention and give them the idea, but never so much that the visual aid itself distracts them.”
President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Teach Ye Diligently (1975), 266.
If you’re looking for something new to help others learn the gospel, you might start by taking a fresh look at something old—
The chalkboard!
Matthew 5:14–16
Consider drawing simple pictures on the board and inviting students to read a scripture to determine the relationship between the pictures.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
The Power of Diligent Learning
Jay E. Jensen, “The Power of Diligent Learning,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 24–28
In the Doctrine and Covenants, the Lord counsels, “Wherefore, now let every man [and woman] learn” and learn “in all diligence,” for he or she that learns not “shall not be counted worthy to stand” (D&C 107:99–100).
It is important to learn diligently. Therefore, it is important to diligently study and read books. That is why I study one chapter in the scriptures, one article in Ensign, and read at least 40 pages in another book, every single day.
The scriptures contain 144 references to learning. Consider some of them:
“Yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered” (Hebrews 5:8).
“Learn wisdom in thy youth; yea, learn in thy youth to keep the commandments of God” (Alma 37:35).
“Learn to be more wise than we” (Mormon 9:31).
“Learn of me, and listen to my words” (D&C 19:23).
“Seek learning, even by study and also by faith” (D&C 88:118).
I learn, not only by studying, but also by serving in faith.
“Study and learn, and become acquainted with all good books, and with languages, tongues, and people” (D&C 90:15).
“[Seek] diligently to learn wisdom and to find truth” (D&C 97:1).
I read books to learn wisdom and learn more of the truth - facts.
As we consider the mandate of such divine admonitions, it is important to reflect on how gospel learning occurs. Gospel learning requires careful reasoning, study, and prayer. However, it is important to remember that each of us is a dual being: a personage of both body and spirit. Because we are spiritual beings, it is essential that we learn by the power of the Spirit.
Learning by the Spirit
The Prophet Joseph Smith taught, “All things whatsoever God in his infinite wisdom has seen fit and proper to reveal to us … are revealed to our spirits precisely as though we had no bodies at all; and those revelations which will save our spirits will save our bodies.”1
In the Doctrine and Covenants, the Lord further emphasizes His divine pattern for teaching and learning:
“Why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth?
“Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together” (D&C 50:21–22).
Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles emphasized the blessings of following this pattern by explaining what it means to understand and be edified: “The verb understand refers to that which is heard. It is the same message to all. Edified concerns that which is communicated by the Holy Ghost. The message can be different and tailored by the Spirit to the needs of each individual.”2
"Edified" means that I receive a personalized message from the Spirit. It is tailored to my needs.
In 2 Nephi 33:1, Nephi reminds us of another aspect of learning by the Spirit: “When a man speaketh by the power of the Holy Ghost the power of the Holy Ghost carrieth it unto the hearts of the children of men.” This is a powerful promise. Yet it is fulfilled only if we invite the Savior into our lives.
The Savior stands at the door and knocks (see Revelation 3:20). The Holy Ghost stands at the door and knocks (see 2 Nephi 33:1–2). All we have to do is use our agency and invite Them in.
The Holy Spirit really does stand at the door and knocks! :-)
Inviting Diligent Learning
In the February 2007 worldwide leadership training meeting on teaching and learning, President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, provided specific counsel on how we can invite such diligent learning. I would like to summarize a few of the things I learned from President Packer about learning.
First, President Packer taught that being diligent learners means we want to learn. We show this desire when we are teachable and when we can be taught without resenting it. When we resent instruction and correction, we offend the Spirit and limit our opportunities for growth and progress.
I should never be resentful, when I receive instruction and correction.
Second, we need to pray—particularly in specifics. Pray formally and informally for yourself and for the teacher. The teacher may not say something quite right. He or she may be weak and feeble in words and expression. But the Holy Ghost is not, and each of us can pray for ourselves and for the teacher: “Oh, Father, the teacher does not know the load and burden that I currently carry. Help him or her to teach me directly.” When you start doing that as a learner, you start getting answers.
I can pray for the teacher, while I'm in class. I can pray that he will be inspired to say things, during which I can be edified.
Third, and this is so significant: listen. In particular, President Packer encourages us to listen to those who are experienced: “I learned early on that there is great value in listening to experience in older people. … I remember in the Quorum of the Twelve, LeGrand Richards didn’t walk as fast as the other Brethren, and I would always wait and open the door for him and walk back to the building with him. One day one of the Brethren said, ‘Oh, you’re so kind to take care of Brother Richards.’ And I thought, ‘You don’t know my selfish motive’—as we would walk back, I would just listen to him. I knew that he could remember Wilford Woodruff, and he would speak.”3
I can also learn a lot from the elderly, who have experience about the past far way back.
Further, listen not only to what is said but also to what is not said: the unspoken promptings of the Holy Ghost. Each is important. Hopefully, you are always sensitive to what is not said by the teacher. If you are, the Holy Ghost will tailor the message to your needs.
Fourth, as you listen, it is important to organize what you learn. Take what you have heard, and then make it yours by writing it down and expanding it. If you really want to ensure that you’ve got it, find somebody to whom you may teach it. Generally speaking, until you can articulate what you’ve learned, you haven’t really learned it. Make the effort to organize what you learn; it will be worth it.
If I do not write the things down, I have learned by the Spirit, or tell it to somebody else, it is probably quickly gone. It needs to be processed, and preferably reviewed.
Preparing to Learn
In addition to what we do in class, we can do many things to invite diligent learning even before we come to class.
President Packer counseled: “Arise from your bed early … and then reflect in the morning when your mind is clear. That’s when the ideas come.”4 I know that is true. As we arise early to study, pray, ponder, and listen, revelation will come.
Two witnesses: Get up early, because then your mind is clear. "That's when the ideas come"! Early probably means before 8. My guess is that it is best from 5 to 6. Good at 6-7. Still fine at 7-8. Ok at 8-9. Not good after 9.
Also, be punctual to your meetings, particularly sacrament meeting, one of the most spiritual meetings in the Church. As you come, be reverent; leave yourself open to revelation. Come and listen to the prelude music. Don’t seek out somebody to talk to. Come as a diligent learner, and prepare yourself to receive revelation.
What to do before sacrament meeting? "Don't seek out somebody to talk to"! Come and listen to the prelude music. Be reverent. Leave yourself open to revelation. Prepare yourself to receive revelation.
Further, we can make a commitment to accept the responsibility for learning no matter how well the teacher or speaker can teach. Several years ago President Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985) remarked: “Testimony meetings are some of the best meetings in the [Church] in the whole month, if you have the spirit. If you are bored at a testimony meeting, there is something the matter with you, and not the other people. You can get up and bear your testimony and you think it is the best meeting in the month; but if you sit there and count the grammatical errors and laugh at the man who can’t speak very well, you’ll be bored. … Don’t forget it! You have to fight for a testimony. You have to keep fighting!”5
Kimball: "If you are bored at a testimony meeting, there is something the matter with YOU, and not the other people."
Now that is a very powerful observation.
Making the Most of Opportunities
Above all, stay at it. President Packer was very emphatic about this in his interview. Don’t give up. Be persistent in learning. Make the most of the many opportunities you have to learn.
Many years ago Elder Marion D. Hanks, while an Assistant to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, spoke of the power of making the most of our opportunities to learn. Elder Hanks told a story about Louis Agassiz, a distinguished naturalist, who was approached by an obscure spinster woman who insisted that she had never had a chance to learn. In response, Dr. Agassiz asked her to consider the chances for learning that she already had:
“ ‘What do you do?’ he asked.
“ ‘I skin potatoes and chop onions.’
“He said, ‘Madame, where do you sit during these interesting but homely duties?’
“ ‘On the bottom step of the kitchen stairs.’
“ ‘Where do your feet rest?’
“ ‘On the glazed brick.’
“ ‘What is glazed brick?’
“ ‘I don’t know, sir.’
“He said, ‘How long have you been sitting there?’
“She said, ‘Fifteen years.’
“ ‘Madam, here is my personal card,’ said Dr. Agassiz. ‘Would you kindly write me a letter concerning the nature of a glazed brick?’ ”
The woman took the challenge seriously. She read all she could find about brick and tile and then sent Dr. Agassiz a 36-page paper on the subject.
Elder Hanks continued:
“Back came the letter from Dr. Agassiz: ‘Dear Madam, this is the best article I have ever seen on the subject. If you will kindly change the three words marked with asterisks, I will have it published and pay you for it.’
“A short time later there came a letter that brought $250, and penciled on the bottom of this letter was this query: ‘What was under those bricks?’ She had learned the value of time and answered with a single word: ‘Ants.’ He wrote back and said, ‘Tell me about the ants.’ …
“After wide reading, much microscopic work, and deep study, the spinster sat down and wrote Dr. Agassiz 360 pages on the subject. He published the book and sent her the money, and she went to visit all the lands of her dreams on the proceeds of her work.”6
Now there’s something very fundamental about that, to invite diligent learning and not be content with mediocrity.
We can become better learners, and by being better learners, we will be better teachers. I want to follow the example of the Savior, a master teacher. But what made Him a master teacher? He was first a learner. May the Lord bless each of us as we follow Him and become better learners.
In the Doctrine and Covenants, the Lord counsels, “Wherefore, now let every man [and woman] learn” and learn “in all diligence,” for he or she that learns not “shall not be counted worthy to stand” (D&C 107:99–100).
It is important to learn diligently. Therefore, it is important to diligently study and read books. That is why I study one chapter in the scriptures, one article in Ensign, and read at least 40 pages in another book, every single day.
The scriptures contain 144 references to learning. Consider some of them:
“Yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered” (Hebrews 5:8).
“Learn wisdom in thy youth; yea, learn in thy youth to keep the commandments of God” (Alma 37:35).
“Learn to be more wise than we” (Mormon 9:31).
“Learn of me, and listen to my words” (D&C 19:23).
“Seek learning, even by study and also by faith” (D&C 88:118).
I learn, not only by studying, but also by serving in faith.
“Study and learn, and become acquainted with all good books, and with languages, tongues, and people” (D&C 90:15).
“[Seek] diligently to learn wisdom and to find truth” (D&C 97:1).
I read books to learn wisdom and learn more of the truth - facts.
As we consider the mandate of such divine admonitions, it is important to reflect on how gospel learning occurs. Gospel learning requires careful reasoning, study, and prayer. However, it is important to remember that each of us is a dual being: a personage of both body and spirit. Because we are spiritual beings, it is essential that we learn by the power of the Spirit.
Learning by the Spirit
The Prophet Joseph Smith taught, “All things whatsoever God in his infinite wisdom has seen fit and proper to reveal to us … are revealed to our spirits precisely as though we had no bodies at all; and those revelations which will save our spirits will save our bodies.”1
In the Doctrine and Covenants, the Lord further emphasizes His divine pattern for teaching and learning:
“Why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth?
“Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together” (D&C 50:21–22).
Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles emphasized the blessings of following this pattern by explaining what it means to understand and be edified: “The verb understand refers to that which is heard. It is the same message to all. Edified concerns that which is communicated by the Holy Ghost. The message can be different and tailored by the Spirit to the needs of each individual.”2
"Edified" means that I receive a personalized message from the Spirit. It is tailored to my needs.
In 2 Nephi 33:1, Nephi reminds us of another aspect of learning by the Spirit: “When a man speaketh by the power of the Holy Ghost the power of the Holy Ghost carrieth it unto the hearts of the children of men.” This is a powerful promise. Yet it is fulfilled only if we invite the Savior into our lives.
The Savior stands at the door and knocks (see Revelation 3:20). The Holy Ghost stands at the door and knocks (see 2 Nephi 33:1–2). All we have to do is use our agency and invite Them in.
The Holy Spirit really does stand at the door and knocks! :-)
Inviting Diligent Learning
In the February 2007 worldwide leadership training meeting on teaching and learning, President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, provided specific counsel on how we can invite such diligent learning. I would like to summarize a few of the things I learned from President Packer about learning.
First, President Packer taught that being diligent learners means we want to learn. We show this desire when we are teachable and when we can be taught without resenting it. When we resent instruction and correction, we offend the Spirit and limit our opportunities for growth and progress.
I should never be resentful, when I receive instruction and correction.
Second, we need to pray—particularly in specifics. Pray formally and informally for yourself and for the teacher. The teacher may not say something quite right. He or she may be weak and feeble in words and expression. But the Holy Ghost is not, and each of us can pray for ourselves and for the teacher: “Oh, Father, the teacher does not know the load and burden that I currently carry. Help him or her to teach me directly.” When you start doing that as a learner, you start getting answers.
I can pray for the teacher, while I'm in class. I can pray that he will be inspired to say things, during which I can be edified.
Third, and this is so significant: listen. In particular, President Packer encourages us to listen to those who are experienced: “I learned early on that there is great value in listening to experience in older people. … I remember in the Quorum of the Twelve, LeGrand Richards didn’t walk as fast as the other Brethren, and I would always wait and open the door for him and walk back to the building with him. One day one of the Brethren said, ‘Oh, you’re so kind to take care of Brother Richards.’ And I thought, ‘You don’t know my selfish motive’—as we would walk back, I would just listen to him. I knew that he could remember Wilford Woodruff, and he would speak.”3
I can also learn a lot from the elderly, who have experience about the past far way back.
Further, listen not only to what is said but also to what is not said: the unspoken promptings of the Holy Ghost. Each is important. Hopefully, you are always sensitive to what is not said by the teacher. If you are, the Holy Ghost will tailor the message to your needs.
Fourth, as you listen, it is important to organize what you learn. Take what you have heard, and then make it yours by writing it down and expanding it. If you really want to ensure that you’ve got it, find somebody to whom you may teach it. Generally speaking, until you can articulate what you’ve learned, you haven’t really learned it. Make the effort to organize what you learn; it will be worth it.
If I do not write the things down, I have learned by the Spirit, or tell it to somebody else, it is probably quickly gone. It needs to be processed, and preferably reviewed.
Preparing to Learn
In addition to what we do in class, we can do many things to invite diligent learning even before we come to class.
President Packer counseled: “Arise from your bed early … and then reflect in the morning when your mind is clear. That’s when the ideas come.”4 I know that is true. As we arise early to study, pray, ponder, and listen, revelation will come.
Two witnesses: Get up early, because then your mind is clear. "That's when the ideas come"! Early probably means before 8. My guess is that it is best from 5 to 6. Good at 6-7. Still fine at 7-8. Ok at 8-9. Not good after 9.
Also, be punctual to your meetings, particularly sacrament meeting, one of the most spiritual meetings in the Church. As you come, be reverent; leave yourself open to revelation. Come and listen to the prelude music. Don’t seek out somebody to talk to. Come as a diligent learner, and prepare yourself to receive revelation.
What to do before sacrament meeting? "Don't seek out somebody to talk to"! Come and listen to the prelude music. Be reverent. Leave yourself open to revelation. Prepare yourself to receive revelation.
Further, we can make a commitment to accept the responsibility for learning no matter how well the teacher or speaker can teach. Several years ago President Spencer W. Kimball (1895–1985) remarked: “Testimony meetings are some of the best meetings in the [Church] in the whole month, if you have the spirit. If you are bored at a testimony meeting, there is something the matter with you, and not the other people. You can get up and bear your testimony and you think it is the best meeting in the month; but if you sit there and count the grammatical errors and laugh at the man who can’t speak very well, you’ll be bored. … Don’t forget it! You have to fight for a testimony. You have to keep fighting!”5
Kimball: "If you are bored at a testimony meeting, there is something the matter with YOU, and not the other people."
Now that is a very powerful observation.
Making the Most of Opportunities
Above all, stay at it. President Packer was very emphatic about this in his interview. Don’t give up. Be persistent in learning. Make the most of the many opportunities you have to learn.
Many years ago Elder Marion D. Hanks, while an Assistant to the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, spoke of the power of making the most of our opportunities to learn. Elder Hanks told a story about Louis Agassiz, a distinguished naturalist, who was approached by an obscure spinster woman who insisted that she had never had a chance to learn. In response, Dr. Agassiz asked her to consider the chances for learning that she already had:
“ ‘What do you do?’ he asked.
“ ‘I skin potatoes and chop onions.’
“He said, ‘Madame, where do you sit during these interesting but homely duties?’
“ ‘On the bottom step of the kitchen stairs.’
“ ‘Where do your feet rest?’
“ ‘On the glazed brick.’
“ ‘What is glazed brick?’
“ ‘I don’t know, sir.’
“He said, ‘How long have you been sitting there?’
“She said, ‘Fifteen years.’
“ ‘Madam, here is my personal card,’ said Dr. Agassiz. ‘Would you kindly write me a letter concerning the nature of a glazed brick?’ ”
The woman took the challenge seriously. She read all she could find about brick and tile and then sent Dr. Agassiz a 36-page paper on the subject.
Elder Hanks continued:
“Back came the letter from Dr. Agassiz: ‘Dear Madam, this is the best article I have ever seen on the subject. If you will kindly change the three words marked with asterisks, I will have it published and pay you for it.’
“A short time later there came a letter that brought $250, and penciled on the bottom of this letter was this query: ‘What was under those bricks?’ She had learned the value of time and answered with a single word: ‘Ants.’ He wrote back and said, ‘Tell me about the ants.’ …
“After wide reading, much microscopic work, and deep study, the spinster sat down and wrote Dr. Agassiz 360 pages on the subject. He published the book and sent her the money, and she went to visit all the lands of her dreams on the proceeds of her work.”6
Now there’s something very fundamental about that, to invite diligent learning and not be content with mediocrity.
We can become better learners, and by being better learners, we will be better teachers. I want to follow the example of the Savior, a master teacher. But what made Him a master teacher? He was first a learner. May the Lord bless each of us as we follow Him and become better learners.
Toothpaste on the Mirror
Bryce R. Petersen, “Toothpaste on the Mirror,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 23
Small things have a way of growing large when we dwell on them.
I learned some very good lessons from Mom and Dad, but the best one I ever learned was about six months after Dad died.
Toward the end of my parents’ lives, there were times they really didn’t get along very well. Dad was not active in the Church, and Mom was impatient with him. They seemed to wear on each other’s nerves some of the time. The arguments weren’t really serious, but I always felt pressured to take sides, a position I didn’t like.
Small offenses have a way of growing large when we dwell on them. One of Mom’s common complaints was that Dad splashed toothpaste on the mirror when he brushed his teeth and would never clean it off. It drove her crazy, and she couldn’t let it go. I tried to explain that in the grand scheme of life, toothpaste on the mirror wasn’t a very big thing. She wasn’t mollified. I wished they could get along better, that they could overlook small things and not be so critical of each other and be more forgiving, but that didn’t happen very often.
Dad died in the spring of 1991. It was a time of grief, especially for Mom. She realized after he was gone that she missed him more than she had anticipated. It was lonesome living alone in that big house; her partner of 62 years was gone. She started talking about him more frequently.
As the days turned to weeks and then to months, I visited Mom daily. During one visit her eyes turned watery as she told me of a mistake that she regretted. She reminded me of the toothpaste and how adamant she had been that he was slothful in neglecting to clean up his mess. She had been so angry over such a small thing.
Mom admitted that on the first cleaning day after Dad died, there was toothpaste on the mirror. She cleaned the mirror, but on the second cleaning day, there was more toothpaste on the mirror. The same thing happened on the third and fourth cleaning days as well.
Mom realized that she had blamed Dad for the toothpaste on the mirror for many years, but it had been both of them splashing toothpaste. She felt terrible that for years she had been so upset about such a small thing. She freely admitted that her anger had hurt her much worse than it had affected Dad.
I learned from this experience the need for forgiveness and tolerance in our relationships, and I honestly try to be more forgiving in my own. It seems such a waste of time to fret about small offenses. There are more important things to worry about than toothpaste on the mirror.
Small things have a way of growing large when we dwell on them.
I learned some very good lessons from Mom and Dad, but the best one I ever learned was about six months after Dad died.
Toward the end of my parents’ lives, there were times they really didn’t get along very well. Dad was not active in the Church, and Mom was impatient with him. They seemed to wear on each other’s nerves some of the time. The arguments weren’t really serious, but I always felt pressured to take sides, a position I didn’t like.
Small offenses have a way of growing large when we dwell on them. One of Mom’s common complaints was that Dad splashed toothpaste on the mirror when he brushed his teeth and would never clean it off. It drove her crazy, and she couldn’t let it go. I tried to explain that in the grand scheme of life, toothpaste on the mirror wasn’t a very big thing. She wasn’t mollified. I wished they could get along better, that they could overlook small things and not be so critical of each other and be more forgiving, but that didn’t happen very often.
Dad died in the spring of 1991. It was a time of grief, especially for Mom. She realized after he was gone that she missed him more than she had anticipated. It was lonesome living alone in that big house; her partner of 62 years was gone. She started talking about him more frequently.
As the days turned to weeks and then to months, I visited Mom daily. During one visit her eyes turned watery as she told me of a mistake that she regretted. She reminded me of the toothpaste and how adamant she had been that he was slothful in neglecting to clean up his mess. She had been so angry over such a small thing.
Mom admitted that on the first cleaning day after Dad died, there was toothpaste on the mirror. She cleaned the mirror, but on the second cleaning day, there was more toothpaste on the mirror. The same thing happened on the third and fourth cleaning days as well.
Mom realized that she had blamed Dad for the toothpaste on the mirror for many years, but it had been both of them splashing toothpaste. She felt terrible that for years she had been so upset about such a small thing. She freely admitted that her anger had hurt her much worse than it had affected Dad.
I learned from this experience the need for forgiveness and tolerance in our relationships, and I honestly try to be more forgiving in my own. It seems such a waste of time to fret about small offenses. There are more important things to worry about than toothpaste on the mirror.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Spiritual Promptings
“Spiritual Promptings,” Ensign, Sep 2008, 18–22
Every Latter-day Saint is given the gift of the Holy Ghost after baptism. It “is the right to have, whenever one is worthy, the companionship of the Holy Ghost” (Bible Dictionary, “Holy Ghost,” 704), providing each of us the opportunity to have personal inspiration and comfort each day of our lives.
The following stories from Church members tell of experiences in which this gift blessed their lives.
Speaking Words I Didn’t Understand
Unmistakable spiritual promptings attended me as a new missionary in Fitiuta, Manua, American Samoa, when I had to conduct a sacrament meeting in a room filled with curious villagers not of our faith.
Aviu, the only Samoan priesthood holder in the village, was bedridden with an illness and couldn’t conduct the meeting. I fasted and prayed fervently, deeply concerned because I could not understand the Samoan language well enough to converse with the people.
When Sunday came, my companion and I blessed the sacrament in English and passed it. I then stood and looked at the congregation. I knew what I wanted to communicate. I tried to open with traditional, polite greetings in Samoan, but the words didn’t come out right. I stopped and closed my eyes, feeling I’d have to speak in English. As I began speaking again, I had a sensation that my mouth was several inches in front of me, speaking in Samoan. The animated expressions on the faces in the congregation showed they understood my words.
After the meeting my companion told me that our Church members said they were happy to hear my talk and that I was speaking perfect Samoan.
I acknowledged the gift in my prayers that night. As the following Sunday approached, Aviu was still unable to leave his sickbed. I again fasted and prayed and had the same experience as the previous Sunday. I was humbled, recognizing again the feeling of being a tool in the Lord’s hands.
The third Sunday approached with Aviu still sick. This time I felt confident the Spirit would prompt me. I wasn’t anxious. I didn’t fast or pray with the same urgency as before. I felt proud to have received the gift of tongues. But this time I failed. The congregation was puzzled when I couldn’t speak Samoan clearly.
Pride stopped me from being receptive to the Spirit that time. This experience helped me learn that promptings will come to me only if I pray humbly and rely on the Spirit.
This story reminds me, that it is important to be humbly and prepare myself, whenever I give a talk as a high councellor.
Blaine L. Gale, Utah
Trapped Outside in the Cold
I was the wrestling coach for a small high school in Alaska, and when we traveled for tournaments we often slept in the hosting school.
During one particular excursion, I got up in the night to use the restroom, but it was locked. Luckily I had propped open the door that led to our sleeping quarters because it locked automatically when closed. Otherwise I would have been locked in a very cold hallway with the only exits leading to the frigid -40 degrees Fahrenheit (-40 degrees C.) outside air. I returned to our sleeping quarters, closed the door, and went back to sleep.
About 2:00 a.m. I awoke with the thought, “What if one of the wrestlers got trapped in that hallway?” I jumped up and saw an empty sleeping bag. I ran to the hallway, making sure the door was propped open behind me. I ran to the front door of the school building and saw no one, but I propped open the door. Then I checked the back door and still saw no one. When I returned to our sleeping quarters, I found that George had gotten back inside through a door I had left open. He was sitting on his sleeping bag shivering uncontrollably. He had been outdoors in subzero temperatures for nearly half an hour wearing only underwear and socks. Anyone familiar with extreme cold temperatures knows that one can go into hypothermia quickly if unclothed. The results could have been devastating if George had been outside even a few more minutes. I put him in his sleeping bag, covered him with my sleeping bag, and sat with him until he stopped shivering and fell asleep.
I had been praying for more guidance from the Holy Ghost in my life, and I recognized this experience as a prompting of the Spirit. I know now that if I pray for spiritual guidance, I will receive it.
I could pray more earnestly for spiritual guidance - to know how to help other people in more ways than I do now.
Steven A. Wolfe, Alaska
Check the Rear Door
One way I distinguish my own thoughts from the promptings of the Holy Ghost is by recalling how I feel when I think about my testimony of the Savior. If I feel the same about spiritual promptings as I do when I think of my testimony—warm and sure—then I know I need to obey.
I first experienced this one day when I received an impression to check the rear door hatch on our van. I had just loaded our three daughters into their car seats while the grocery clerk placed several weeks’ worth of groceries into the back of our van and slammed the hatch door. I dismissed the feeling to stop and check the door, and drove away. But the thought persisted.
As I compared the feelings I had about the persistent thought to how I feel when I think about my testimony of Jesus, I realized the warm and sure feelings were the same. I felt the guidance was from the Holy Spirit, so I stopped to check the hatch door just before we reached a steep hill.
Not believing there would be anything to discover, I was surprised to find that, although the door was completely closed, the 20-year-old latch was jammed and not secure. If I had driven up the hill, the force of the tilting grocery sacks could have been enough to push the door open. Several weeks’ worth of food would have spilled out the back, a loss our poor student budget could not have replaced. I am grateful the Lord was watching out for our needs.
S. Jill Wirtz, Wisconsin
One Scripture
Although I had not been active in the Church for nearly 18 years, I had decided to say daily prayers. On one particular morning, each time I drifted out of sleep, I would say a silent prayer asking my Heavenly Father to help me wake up and stop being unhappy. I was weighed down by sadness and hopelessness, which I had often felt throughout the past year or so, but today was particularly difficult.
Then I heard a voice speak very clearly, “Psalm 24:7.” I hadn’t thought about the scriptures in years. I got dressed and headed toward my bookshelf, but I began to doubt. I didn’t make it to the bookshelf until later that day when sheer curiosity got me to open the scriptures. I read the passage carefully: “Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lift up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.”
“What a coincidence,” I thought. “Does God speak to people this way?” I decided to search for further answers in the scriptures. One passage stood out to me:
“Wherefore, now after I have spoken these words, if ye cannot understand them it will be because ye ask not, neither do ye knock; wherefore, ye are not brought into the light, but must perish in the dark.
“For behold, again I say unto you that if ye will enter in by the way, and receive the Holy Ghost, it will show unto you all things what ye should do” (2 Nephi 32:4–5).
From that passage I learned I needed to ask, knock, enter by the way, and receive the Holy Ghost in order to know all things I should do.
It was such a small thing—one passage of scripture. It was such a small voice, one that seemed it could have been my own thought. I could have shrugged off the experience as my mind playing tricks on me, but instead I continued to ask, knock, enter, and receive—here a little and there a little. I have been an active member of the Church since this experience and have also received my temple endowment.
Kristi Gatti, Texas
A Mother’s Intuition
My daughter Stacey became ill a few days before her 14th birthday. When her condition did not improve over the weekend, my husband took her to the doctor the following Monday. She was diagnosed with the flu, and over the next two days her condition worsened. She coughed all night and burned with fever.
Something seemed terribly wrong, and I wondered what the problem could be. I felt I heard someone whisper, “She has pneumonia.”
I didn’t know the symptoms of pneumonia but knew the disease could be deadly. I immediately called our doctor and scheduled an appointment for the same morning. At 10:00 a.m. our daughter had a fever of 105 degrees Fahrenheit (40.6 degrees C.). After checking her again, the doctor maintained that Stacey had only the flu.
“Could she have pneumonia?” I asked. He shook his head no. I asked him to check her lungs. He did so reluctantly and answered my searching look with a noncommittal shrug. “How can we eliminate the possibility of pneumonia?” I asked.
He clearly did not want to test her, but I insisted. His tone was strong when he said, “She would have to be X-rayed at the hospital, and she is clearly ill and needs bed rest. Don’t drag her out anymore. Let her rest.”
I felt guilty when we left his office. Doctors are professionals. I wondered if I had overreacted, but I had learned to trust my feelings, so I decided to have her X-rayed.
The X-ray found pneumonia in her left lung. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic, and we thought that would be the end of it. It wasn’t.
Her condition worsened so much that I felt I should take Stacey to the hospital immediately. When we arrived, the emergency room doctor told us to take her home. Because of the promptings I had already received, we refused and asked for another opinion from the pediatrician on duty. I felt peace the moment I saw him. He prescribed a different medication and admitted her to the hospital with acute pneumonia. Within three days Stacey was well enough to return home, and two weeks later she was healthy again. I believe the promptings I received from the Spirit had probably saved her life.
The Spirit can prompt to help know if I should believe the doctors or if I should try to push some treatment.
Diana Loski, Pennsylvania
Helps for Home Evening
1. Wrap a small empty box as a present. Explain that it represents the Holy Ghost. Let a family member unwrap it. Read the first paragraph of the article. Explain that we cannot see the Holy Ghost, but His influence can be a great gift in our lives. Let family members share examples of promptings in their lives from the Holy Ghost. Challenge family members to listen to the promptings of the Holy Ghost.
2. Have family members read the stories of people receiving spiritual promptings. Discuss why the Holy Ghost was available to these individuals and how He helped them. Have young children draw pictures of how the Holy Ghost prompted these people or how the Holy Ghost might prompt them in the activities of their lives.
Every Latter-day Saint is given the gift of the Holy Ghost after baptism. It “is the right to have, whenever one is worthy, the companionship of the Holy Ghost” (Bible Dictionary, “Holy Ghost,” 704), providing each of us the opportunity to have personal inspiration and comfort each day of our lives.
The following stories from Church members tell of experiences in which this gift blessed their lives.
Speaking Words I Didn’t Understand
Unmistakable spiritual promptings attended me as a new missionary in Fitiuta, Manua, American Samoa, when I had to conduct a sacrament meeting in a room filled with curious villagers not of our faith.
Aviu, the only Samoan priesthood holder in the village, was bedridden with an illness and couldn’t conduct the meeting. I fasted and prayed fervently, deeply concerned because I could not understand the Samoan language well enough to converse with the people.
When Sunday came, my companion and I blessed the sacrament in English and passed it. I then stood and looked at the congregation. I knew what I wanted to communicate. I tried to open with traditional, polite greetings in Samoan, but the words didn’t come out right. I stopped and closed my eyes, feeling I’d have to speak in English. As I began speaking again, I had a sensation that my mouth was several inches in front of me, speaking in Samoan. The animated expressions on the faces in the congregation showed they understood my words.
After the meeting my companion told me that our Church members said they were happy to hear my talk and that I was speaking perfect Samoan.
I acknowledged the gift in my prayers that night. As the following Sunday approached, Aviu was still unable to leave his sickbed. I again fasted and prayed and had the same experience as the previous Sunday. I was humbled, recognizing again the feeling of being a tool in the Lord’s hands.
The third Sunday approached with Aviu still sick. This time I felt confident the Spirit would prompt me. I wasn’t anxious. I didn’t fast or pray with the same urgency as before. I felt proud to have received the gift of tongues. But this time I failed. The congregation was puzzled when I couldn’t speak Samoan clearly.
Pride stopped me from being receptive to the Spirit that time. This experience helped me learn that promptings will come to me only if I pray humbly and rely on the Spirit.
This story reminds me, that it is important to be humbly and prepare myself, whenever I give a talk as a high councellor.
Blaine L. Gale, Utah
Trapped Outside in the Cold
I was the wrestling coach for a small high school in Alaska, and when we traveled for tournaments we often slept in the hosting school.
During one particular excursion, I got up in the night to use the restroom, but it was locked. Luckily I had propped open the door that led to our sleeping quarters because it locked automatically when closed. Otherwise I would have been locked in a very cold hallway with the only exits leading to the frigid -40 degrees Fahrenheit (-40 degrees C.) outside air. I returned to our sleeping quarters, closed the door, and went back to sleep.
About 2:00 a.m. I awoke with the thought, “What if one of the wrestlers got trapped in that hallway?” I jumped up and saw an empty sleeping bag. I ran to the hallway, making sure the door was propped open behind me. I ran to the front door of the school building and saw no one, but I propped open the door. Then I checked the back door and still saw no one. When I returned to our sleeping quarters, I found that George had gotten back inside through a door I had left open. He was sitting on his sleeping bag shivering uncontrollably. He had been outdoors in subzero temperatures for nearly half an hour wearing only underwear and socks. Anyone familiar with extreme cold temperatures knows that one can go into hypothermia quickly if unclothed. The results could have been devastating if George had been outside even a few more minutes. I put him in his sleeping bag, covered him with my sleeping bag, and sat with him until he stopped shivering and fell asleep.
I had been praying for more guidance from the Holy Ghost in my life, and I recognized this experience as a prompting of the Spirit. I know now that if I pray for spiritual guidance, I will receive it.
I could pray more earnestly for spiritual guidance - to know how to help other people in more ways than I do now.
Steven A. Wolfe, Alaska
Check the Rear Door
One way I distinguish my own thoughts from the promptings of the Holy Ghost is by recalling how I feel when I think about my testimony of the Savior. If I feel the same about spiritual promptings as I do when I think of my testimony—warm and sure—then I know I need to obey.
I first experienced this one day when I received an impression to check the rear door hatch on our van. I had just loaded our three daughters into their car seats while the grocery clerk placed several weeks’ worth of groceries into the back of our van and slammed the hatch door. I dismissed the feeling to stop and check the door, and drove away. But the thought persisted.
As I compared the feelings I had about the persistent thought to how I feel when I think about my testimony of Jesus, I realized the warm and sure feelings were the same. I felt the guidance was from the Holy Spirit, so I stopped to check the hatch door just before we reached a steep hill.
Not believing there would be anything to discover, I was surprised to find that, although the door was completely closed, the 20-year-old latch was jammed and not secure. If I had driven up the hill, the force of the tilting grocery sacks could have been enough to push the door open. Several weeks’ worth of food would have spilled out the back, a loss our poor student budget could not have replaced. I am grateful the Lord was watching out for our needs.
S. Jill Wirtz, Wisconsin
One Scripture
Although I had not been active in the Church for nearly 18 years, I had decided to say daily prayers. On one particular morning, each time I drifted out of sleep, I would say a silent prayer asking my Heavenly Father to help me wake up and stop being unhappy. I was weighed down by sadness and hopelessness, which I had often felt throughout the past year or so, but today was particularly difficult.
Then I heard a voice speak very clearly, “Psalm 24:7.” I hadn’t thought about the scriptures in years. I got dressed and headed toward my bookshelf, but I began to doubt. I didn’t make it to the bookshelf until later that day when sheer curiosity got me to open the scriptures. I read the passage carefully: “Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lift up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.”
“What a coincidence,” I thought. “Does God speak to people this way?” I decided to search for further answers in the scriptures. One passage stood out to me:
“Wherefore, now after I have spoken these words, if ye cannot understand them it will be because ye ask not, neither do ye knock; wherefore, ye are not brought into the light, but must perish in the dark.
“For behold, again I say unto you that if ye will enter in by the way, and receive the Holy Ghost, it will show unto you all things what ye should do” (2 Nephi 32:4–5).
From that passage I learned I needed to ask, knock, enter by the way, and receive the Holy Ghost in order to know all things I should do.
It was such a small thing—one passage of scripture. It was such a small voice, one that seemed it could have been my own thought. I could have shrugged off the experience as my mind playing tricks on me, but instead I continued to ask, knock, enter, and receive—here a little and there a little. I have been an active member of the Church since this experience and have also received my temple endowment.
Kristi Gatti, Texas
A Mother’s Intuition
My daughter Stacey became ill a few days before her 14th birthday. When her condition did not improve over the weekend, my husband took her to the doctor the following Monday. She was diagnosed with the flu, and over the next two days her condition worsened. She coughed all night and burned with fever.
Something seemed terribly wrong, and I wondered what the problem could be. I felt I heard someone whisper, “She has pneumonia.”
I didn’t know the symptoms of pneumonia but knew the disease could be deadly. I immediately called our doctor and scheduled an appointment for the same morning. At 10:00 a.m. our daughter had a fever of 105 degrees Fahrenheit (40.6 degrees C.). After checking her again, the doctor maintained that Stacey had only the flu.
“Could she have pneumonia?” I asked. He shook his head no. I asked him to check her lungs. He did so reluctantly and answered my searching look with a noncommittal shrug. “How can we eliminate the possibility of pneumonia?” I asked.
He clearly did not want to test her, but I insisted. His tone was strong when he said, “She would have to be X-rayed at the hospital, and she is clearly ill and needs bed rest. Don’t drag her out anymore. Let her rest.”
I felt guilty when we left his office. Doctors are professionals. I wondered if I had overreacted, but I had learned to trust my feelings, so I decided to have her X-rayed.
The X-ray found pneumonia in her left lung. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic, and we thought that would be the end of it. It wasn’t.
Her condition worsened so much that I felt I should take Stacey to the hospital immediately. When we arrived, the emergency room doctor told us to take her home. Because of the promptings I had already received, we refused and asked for another opinion from the pediatrician on duty. I felt peace the moment I saw him. He prescribed a different medication and admitted her to the hospital with acute pneumonia. Within three days Stacey was well enough to return home, and two weeks later she was healthy again. I believe the promptings I received from the Spirit had probably saved her life.
The Spirit can prompt to help know if I should believe the doctors or if I should try to push some treatment.
Diana Loski, Pennsylvania
Helps for Home Evening
1. Wrap a small empty box as a present. Explain that it represents the Holy Ghost. Let a family member unwrap it. Read the first paragraph of the article. Explain that we cannot see the Holy Ghost, but His influence can be a great gift in our lives. Let family members share examples of promptings in their lives from the Holy Ghost. Challenge family members to listen to the promptings of the Holy Ghost.
2. Have family members read the stories of people receiving spiritual promptings. Discuss why the Holy Ghost was available to these individuals and how He helped them. Have young children draw pictures of how the Holy Ghost prompted these people or how the Holy Ghost might prompt them in the activities of their lives.
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